A Ceremony of Parting (when someone is dying)

A Ceremony of Parting

The liturgies, celebrations, ceremonies, prayers, and reflections offered on this blog
are the result of my thoughts, reflections, and experiences,
woven together using my own words and sometimes adapting the words others have used:
I am indebted to their wisdom.
Please note that the Rites of Passage liturgies are offered as templates,
and should be adapted as appropriate for your particular gathering.
This ceremony of prayer and anointing is appropriate for use by any group of people,
or by any individual, saying good bye to a loved one who is very close to death.
Everyone is invited to join in saying the words in large bold type.

Opening words (from Ecclesiastes 3):

For everything there is a season,

and a time for every purpose under heaven:

     a time to be born and a time to die;

     a time to mourn and a time to dance…

That which is, already has been;

that which is to be, already is:

     and God seeks out what has gone by.

We meet here because the life we have shared with N is coming to an end,

and it is time to part from her for a while:

We stand today on the boundary of change

between the life God gives in this world

and the new life beyond death. 

N will soon step over that boundary into the life beyond,
and one day, when our time comes, we too will cross the threshold:  
     to be reunited with N and all our loved ones once again.

Prayers:

Creator God, Lord of life and death, you renew our inner strength,

you touch our imagination, and you enable us to find meaning

in all life’s changing circumstances.

     Embrace us in our uncertainties, and lift our hope,

     as we ask your blessing on our parting from N.

As we surround her with our love and prayers,

so surround us all with the comfort of your presence:

     Surround us with your peace which is beyond understanding.

We pray for N, whom we love, who now lives in a land of shadows

where the light of memory is dimmed, the familiar lies unknown,
and the beloved become as strangers.
     May those who care for her be granted  

     wisdom and skill, love and patience.

May those who are sick or hurt be healed:

May those who are in distress be comforted.

May those who are dying know peace:

May those who are grieving find strength.

And may whatever is broken in our lives be restored to wholeness:

Amen.

The Anointing:

N, I anoint you with oil in the name of God who gives you life.

         By this blessing, and by God’s most tender mercy,

may you receive love, light, and release from suffering:    

     May God preserve you in all goodness
     and bring you to everlasting life.

The Release:

To love someone is to risk the pain of parting, 

and not to love is never to have lived.

N, we love and honour you;

we thank you for all you have shared with us

all you have enabled us to share with you,

and for the difference you have made to our lives.

We believe that, although we may lose sight of one another for a while,

we will meet again, where there is no more sadness, pain or death,

in the brightness of God’s eternity.

Silence is kept

Go forth, O soul, from this world:

     We release you into God’s care.

Return to God who created you:

     Return to God who loves you,

     and who welcomes you home.

God who gives us life, and in whose arms we die,

nothing in all creation can separate us from your love.

Hear us, as we entrust to you your beloved child N.

Accept her into your safe keeping,

hold her in the strong embrace of your love,

and grant her rest, free from illusion or pain or regret,

for ever in your peace.

     Amen.

Silence is kept

Eternal God, we thank you for giving N to be with us,

and for the journey we have shared with her on earth,

which has now ended.

We praise you that for N all suffering and sorrow are ended,

death itself is past, and she lives for ever in your love and care.

Comfort us in our grief, embrace us with your love,

and give us grace to let N go into her new life

where she shall no more be in need or pain;

and may we at last find life and peace and perfect joy

with N in your presence.

     Amen.

Parting words:

We are born of the death of stars,

and to star-dust our bodies return.

N, into the freedom of wind and sunshine:

     we let you go.

Into the dance of the stars and planets:

     we let you go.

Into the winds breath, and the hands of the star-maker:

     we let you go.

A Ceremony of Welcome & Naming (for a child)

A Ceremony of Welcome

The arrival of a child into a family is a cause for celebration. Many people experience a sense of awe at the creation of new life, and want to express their thanks to God. This ceremony provides an opportunity for parents, family, and friends, to give thanks for the new child, and to pray for family life. It may be a private or a public celebration, at home or elsewhere. It is not the same as Baptism (sometimes called Christening), which is the sacrament of initiation into membership of the Christian church.

You will need a Loving Cup of wine or juice for everyone to share, and a large candle and matches to light it. Please use common sense when lighting candles and ensure everyone's safety.

Please note that the Rites of Passage liturgies are offered as templates,

and should be adapted as appropriate for your particular gathering.

There may be one leader, or you can take it in turns around the circle of speak the biddings. Everyone is invited to join in saying the words in large bold type.

The liturgies, celebrations, ceremonies, prayers, and reflections offered on this blog are the result of my thoughts, reflections, and experiences, woven together using my own words and sometimes adapting the words others have used: I am indebted to their wisdom. Please use these liturgies freely, adapting them as suits your own context. I am always pleased to hear from people who have used them.

The Welcome:

We gather today to celebrate the arrival of a child,

to welcome her/him into our hearts and lives,

and formally to give her/him a name of her/his own.

The arrival of a child is a solemn and joyous event in the life of a family,

and an occasion for rejoicing in the community.

I bid you, therefore, to join (parents' names)

in giving thanks to the Lord of all life for this gift of a daughter/son,

(and with (names) for a new sister/brother),

and to support them in their responsibilities with prayer and love.

(Parents' names), do you receive this child as a gift from God?

We do.

Do you wish to give thanks and seek a blessing for your child?

We do.

Child, you open our hearts once again

to the mystery and wonder of love and life,

and your arrival is a blessing to us all.

We welcome you:

     Child, we welcome you with the greeting of love,

     with the greeting of light, with the greeting of life!

The Thanksgiving:

God our creator, we thank you for the mystery of human love,

and for the wonder of this new life, this child,

who has been given to (parents' names)

and who has become part of our world.

We thank you for all whose support and skill

surround and sustain the beginning of life.

We thank you that we are known to you by name,

and loved by you from all eternity.

     Lord of all life, we thank you

     for the blessing you bestow on this family, and on us all,

     in the gift of this child.

The Promises of the Parents and Guardians:

To be a parent is to love and nurture,

and to lead a child happily to fulfil her/his potential.

It is to guide her/him along life's path,

teaching her/him and learning from her/him,

reining her/him in, and giving her/him wings.

It is to smile at her/his joy and weep at her/his pain,

to walk beside her/him, and, one day,

to allow her/him to walk alone.

To be a parent is a great gift,

and the greatest responsibility we shall ever have.

     God of love, confirm this family's joy

     by a lively sense of your presence with them.

     Give them calm strength and quiet wisdom

     as they seek to bring this child to love all that is

     true and just, gracious, pure, and peaceful.

The parents say:

We offer our thanks for the gift of this child,

entrusted to our care.

We promise to bring her/him up to the best of our ability,

with patience, understanding, and laughter,

ready to guide, to learn, and to forgive.

We will delight in her/him every day,

sharing pleasures and pains,

times of fun and times of trial,

and we will always love her/him.

(Guardians' names), you stand beside (parents' names)

in caring for this child.

To be a child's guardian is to love and to nurture,

to show guidance and to counsel;

it is to help the child make choices

should s/he need assistance as s/he grows;

it is to be a second mother and father, and to be there when called upon.

Will you do all that you can to help and support

(parents' names) in the bringing up of this child?

The guardians say:

We promise that we will do all we can

to help in the good upbringing of this child.

Child, we welcome you into your family

and into our hearts.

Your parents love you, and we are glad

that they have given you the gift of life.

We thank them for sharing with us the joys,

the challenges, and the risks of parenthood.

We ask God to watch over you and us,

and we pray that you and your family

are blessed with love and light.

The Naming:

What name do you give this child?

(Parents:) Her/his name is (name).

Child, you are (name).

Bear your name with honour,

and become who you are, unique and precious.

May you bring joy into your family,

share a glad welcome with all those you meet,

and light up this world with love.

(Parents' names), receive this candle on behalf of (name)

as a sign of God's light in her/his life.

Light it on her/his birthday,

on the anniversary of this welcome ceremony,

and at times both of sorrow and of rejoicing.

(Name), may you always be healthy and happy;

may you have love in your heart, and light in your life,

and may you be a bright blessing to all who meet you.

Amen!

Reading: Luke 18.15-17

The Blessing:

As the Jesus took children in his arms and blessed them,

so now we ask God's blessing on (name):

     God of love, of light, of life,

     we praise you for (name's) arrival among us.

     Surround her/him with your blessings,

     that s/he may learn to love all that is true,

     and grow in kindness and strength.

     Bless her/his parents and guardians,

     and give them grace to love and care for (name).

     Help them to provide for (name's) needs

     with wisdom and patience, good humour and faith,

     and, by their example, reveal to (name)

     the ways of truth and love.

The Honouring:

(Parents' names), as the loving cup is passed from hand to hand,

carry (name) around the circle of your family and friends,

so that everyone may greet your new child, saying,

before they take a sip from the cup:

      (Name), I welcome and honour you!

The Closing Words:

(Name), we have welcomed, named and honoured you,

offered our thanksgiving to God for your coming,

and asked for blessings upon you and your family.

Now we lift up your future to God's care:

     Into your hands, O God, we place this child, (name).

Support her/him today and always

in her/his sorrows and joys, and in her/his mistakes and successes.

     As s/he grows in age, may s/he grow also in grace.

(Name), may the sun bring you new energy by day:

     may the moon softly restore you by night.

May the rain wash away your worries:

     may the breeze fill you with new strength.

May you walk gently through the world:

     and know its beauty all the days of your life. Amen!

A Ceremony Blessing for a New Home

A Ceremony of Blessing for a New Home

You will need a candle & matches to light it, a Bible (or another book of Scripture, according to the faith tradition of the new home owner), oil, incense (such as a joss stick)

Please note that the Rites of Passage liturgies are offered as templates,

and should be adapted as appropriate for your particular gathering.

There may be one leader, or you can take it in turns around the circle of speak the biddings. Everyone is invited to join in saying the words in bold type.

The liturgies, celebrations, ceremonies, prayers, and reflections offered on this blog are the result of my thoughts, reflections, and experiences, woven together using my own words and sometimes adapting the words others have used: I am indebted to their wisdom. Please use these liturgies freely, adapting them as suits your own context. I am always pleased to hear from people who have used them.

Opening Words:

Welcome to (address)!

Moving into a new home can be a wonderful event,

settling into a new place that will hold cherished memories,

a place that will be a sanctuary for many people,

a place for love, nurturing, friendship and growth.

N has chosen this place to be her home.

She has cleaned it, decorated it, and brought her possessions into it,

items which are part of both her past and her future here;

she has brought her dreams and her hopes,

her gifts, her energy, and her needs.

This ceremony will act as a bridge

between N’s previous life and her new one,

as we ask God to bless N’s new home and her life here.

First we welcome all of you, whom N has brought together.

You are signs of the generous hospitality that N and this new home offer.

Secondly we light this candle, (a candle is lit)

as a sign that God is present and welcome in this new home.

And thirdly, we open this Bible and hear N affirm her faith in God

through her reading of scripture:

Reading: Psalm 121 (or another reading chosen by N)

Prayer:

We give thanks to you, O God,

for you are the giver of life and the healer of wounds.

We give thanks to you, O God,

for in you is our hope and trust.

We give thanks to you, O God,

for your light abides with us, wherever we are.

We give thanks to you, O God,

for watching over this home

and all who dwell in it. Amen.

The Preparation of Oil and Incense:

May God bless the oil and the incense we use

to anoint and bless this new home:

May love, prosperity, peace, health and harmony

fill the spaces between wherever they touch.

The Procession of Blessing

during which the doors and windows of each room are anointed

and the area is censed:

Outside the main door:

     May whoever knocks at the door to this home

     be met with compassion, peace and graciousness…

Inside the main door:

     May all those enter through this door be welcome 

     as they come in and blessed as they depart,
     and may no harm cross this portal…

In the living room:

     May all who gather in this room 

     enjoy both conversation and quietness, 
     both giving and receiving, both work and recreation…

In each bedroom: 

     May all who rest in this room   

     be blessed with peaceful sleep 
     and a joyful awakening each day…

In each bathroom/lavatory:

     May all who use/wash in this room

     be refreshed and cleansed in their bodies and minds…

In the kitchen:

     May all who cook/eat in in this kitchen    

     delight in providing good food and drink for the body and the soul…

In the dining room:

     May all who eat in this room    

     delight in sharing good food and drink and company...

Returning to main door, N places a cross or another symbol over the lintel saying:

I place this ... above this door as a sign of God’s protection,

         and of the security and peace of my new home.

Prayer of Blessing:

May God bless this home,

all who live here, and all who visit here:

Peace be with this home and with all who live and visit here.

May its windows catch the sun, and its doors open wide

to beloved family, friends and strangers.

May each room resound with laughter,
the walls shut out troubles, and hold in warmth and cheer:

May this home be filled with joy in the morning

and sweet dreams in the night.

May this be a home where love has come to live:

May this home be filled with God’s love

and the love you share with one another.

May peace, harmony, and laughter

be yours in abundance as long as you live.

May you be granted fulfilment and joy.

May God watch over you, your friends and your family.

May this home and those who live here

provide care in times of sickness, rest in times of weariness,

comfort in times of grief, protection in times of anxiety,

and delight in times of joy.

May love and happiness fill this place

and may God be close to those who live in this home.

God, be their shelter when they are at home;

be their companion when they are away;

be their welcome guest when they return.

May God’s presence bless you and your home

until you reach your final home in heaven.

Amen.

A song may now be sung, and a meal may be shared